Leadership and vulnerability might seem like opposing forces, but they’re actually complementary if you think about it. Effective leaders are human—with thoughts, feelings, and the need for connection. Sharing their thoughts and emotions with others is a critical aspect of communication and connection. Whether you are communicating with family, friends, mentors, or colleagues, what’s most important is feeling safe and setting clear expectations for both yourself and the other party.
We’re constantly sharing what’s happening around us, even when we don’t consciously focus on it. However, if there’s a topic you’re hesitant to discuss, it might be an indicator that you need a strategy for sharing. To guide this process, start by asking yourself two key questions:
When you need help solving a problem, consider seeking out team members or peers with D (Dominance) or C (Conscientiousness) DISC styles. These task-oriented individuals excel at focusing on information, decision-making, and compliance. They’re more likely to prioritize finding actionable solutions and less likely to get sidetracked by emotions—an approach that’s especially useful under tight deadlines.
On the other hand, if you’re grappling with emotions or internalizing a challenge, turn to someone with an I (Influence) or S (Steadiness) DISC style. People-oriented individuals with these styles shine in their ability to communicate and empathize. They create a nurturing space where you can “talk it out,” feel understood, and find inspiration to tackle challenges with renewed energy. Often, this type of sharing can recharge your motivation and focus.
Sometimes, it’s not just about finding a solution or venting but also about gaining new perspectives. DISC personalities can complement one another’s strengths. For instance, pairing a D and an I can bring a combination of decisiveness and creativity to problem-solving, while an S and a C might offer empathy and a detailed approach. Recognizing these synergies allows leaders to tap into the collective strengths of their teams more effectively.
As leaders and managers, we sometimes hesitate to share our thoughts and feelings due to concerns about causing unnecessary stress or uncertainty for others. We might also question how others will respond to sensitive information. That’s where understanding the DISC styles of your team becomes invaluable. By recognizing their dominant fears, motivations, and values, you can adjust your approach to align with both your needs and theirs. Going beyond DISC, you can take things to an even deeper level of understanding by pairing DISC with TEAMS, Values, and/or BAI, depending on your specific goals.
Building trust is an essential part of creating a safe environment for sharing. Leaders can foster this trust by demonstrating consistency, authenticity, and respect for individual differences. When team members feel valued and understood, they are more likely to reciprocate and engage in open communication. This two-way trust creates a foundation for collaborative problem-solving and stronger team dynamics.
If you’re avoiding hard questions because they’re uncomfortable, it’s worth remembering: people are likely already thinking about those questions. Being transparent and genuine, even in challenging times, demonstrates trust and authenticity. Leaders don’t need to be superhuman to be effective; they just need to be honest and strategic. Trust in the team you’ve built to help navigate difficulties.
Intentional communication is not only about knowing when to share but also about tailoring your message to your audience. By leveraging the strengths of different DISC personalities, you can ensure your message resonates and achieves the desired impact. For example:
With D personalities, keep your communication concise and focused on results. Present challenges as opportunities for action.
For I personalities, frame your message in a way that emphasizes collaboration and excitement. Appeal to their creativity and enthusiasm.
When addressing S personalities, focus on reassurance and stability. Show how your message aligns with team harmony and well-being.
For C personalities, provide detailed information and logic to support your points. Respect their need for clarity and precision.
By aligning your communication style with your audience’s DISC traits, you create a space where both parties feel understood and valued. This not only enhances your ability to lead effectively but also strengthens relationships within your team.
Remember: leaders thrive when they embrace both their strengths and vulnerabilities, and when they recognize the value of diversity in behavioral styles. Sharing intentionally and strategically allows you to address your own needs while fostering trust, understanding, and collaboration within your team. By doing this, you’ll help cultivate a culture of openness and resilience that benefits everyone.